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Doran Website Is "Historical" Comprelli Claims


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According to an unconfirmed report, Schools Superintendent and Town Historian, Anthony Comprelli, declared that JimDoran.com is now a “historical site.”

“We’ve been talking to the state historical commission about this. That website of his has virtually been left untouched since the last century,” Comprelli explained.

Comprelli went on. “I mean, you can go there and get linked to Governor Whitman. I think he even has a link to Noah and his Ark. I mean, we’re talking pre-September 11 here. It’s a classic. This is a snapshot of history itself.”

When asked if a website qualifies as a “historical site,” Comprelli responded, “Yes it does. I think they call it ‘E-documents.’ Getting this designation would only add to the yellowed-with-age newsletters and promises from Doran in our collection.”

“I think Jim knows about the antiquity of his site,” Comprelli elaborated. “But if necessary, we’ll get a court order to stop him from making any current up-dates to the site. I mean, that site belongs to history now.”

“Whatever,” Councilman James P. Doran angrily responded when asked about the possible historical significance of his website. “I mean, is Comprelli or the state going to be picking up my monthly Geocities charge? And he needs a court order to stop me from making any changes to the website? Hello!? Have you seen the site? Like I make changes”, Doran rhetorically retorted.

Comprelli further pressed the matter by saying “that website is now out of Doran’s hands. It now belongs to posterity.”

“I know Doran. He’s a fine young man- a little brash for my taste, though. One would have thought he would have a better sense of culture or history, you know? Didn’t he just get his doctorate?” Comprelli asked. “But there you have it. That website is a historical artifact now. And Doran can’t change that.”

As of the date of this issue, Doran has not made any changes to his website.

(Again, this was an unconfirmed report.)

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According to an unconfirmed report, Schools Superintendent and Town Historian, Anthony Comprelli, declared that JimDoran.com is now a “historical site.”

“We’ve been talking to the state historical commission about this.  That website of his has virtually been left untouched since the last century,” Comprelli explained.

Comprelli went on. “I mean, you can go there and get linked to Governor Whitman.  I think he even has a link to Noah and his Ark.  I mean, we’re talking pre-September 11 here.  It’s a classic.  This is a snapshot of history itself.”

When asked if a website qualifies as a “historical site,” Comprelli responded, “Yes it does.  I think they call it ‘E-documents.’  Getting this designation would only add to the yellowed-with-age newsletters and promises from Doran in our collection.”

“I think Jim knows about the antiquity of his site,” Comprelli elaborated.  “But if necessary, we’ll get a court order to stop him from making any current up-dates to the site.  I mean, that site belongs to history now.”

“Whatever,” Councilman James P. Doran angrily responded when asked about the possible historical significance of his website.  “I mean, is Comprelli or the state going to be picking up my monthly Geocities charge? And he needs a court order to stop me from making any changes to the website?  Hello!?  Have you seen the site?  Like I make changes”, Doran rhetorically retorted.

Comprelli further pressed the matter by saying “that website is now out of Doran’s hands.  It now belongs to posterity.”

“I know Doran.  He’s a fine young man- a little brash for my taste, though.  One would have thought he would have a better sense of culture or history, you know? Didn’t he just get his doctorate?” Comprelli asked. “But there you have it. That website is a historical artifact now.  And Doran can’t change that.”

As of the date of this issue, Doran has not made any changes to his website.

(Again, this was an unconfirmed report.)

He's also got a link there to the 1998 Harrison Summer Swimming Program. Funny.

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